Top Ten Stories of the Year: A Year of Turmoil

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Published on: December 21, 2012

10) Headbook Goes Public

Headbook, one of the largest media mogulates in the galaxy, made headlines when it sold shares this year. Great things were expected from the media juggernaut who revolutionized social networking on the Alkranet. However, the Mogul’s transition from public to private has not been an easy one. Shares started around 17 krohl each, but dropped drastically in the first few days. To date, Headbook’s stock has not recovered its value. The Mogul is using outside help to try and drive interest and raise stock prices.

9) Scandal Removes Chungkin Mogul Secretary Bilai Xo

The Chungkin Mogulate Bilai Xo was recently removed from his position after a sex and corruption scandal was made public. People wishing to influence Xo’s favor could not bribe him with money due to Chungkin’s strict policies. However, those wishing to influence him were able to find a loophole. By using barely legal prostitutes, Xo could be bought without money actually changing hands. Xo’s successor was recently sworn in after a relatively quiet election. The new Chungkin Mogulate has declared that his reign will be a return to stability and normalcy, and that scandals like the one that Xo caused will not be a problem in the future.

8) Banks Launder Money for Narcotic Moguls and Pirate Barons

WVA and BSHC have both been indicted in a massive money laundering scheme. The Eurysatas-based Moguls have been proven guilty of laundering money through Kroy financial systems. The scheme started over 9 years ago, and for 6 years the scheme provided clean funds to some of the worse narcotics moguls in the galaxy. These terrifying despots used the funds to wage war on the Kroy forces who opposed them. And those same moguls began to kill the innocent people who stood in their way. But three years ago a lawyer in the rural belt of Kroy was prosecuting a doctor accused of cheating the healthcare system to rob his patients. And as he researched BSHC’s role in the crime, he realized the roots of the corruption ran deeper than he could have imagined. BSHC alone must now pay the Kroy 1.9 billion krohl – the largest bank penalty to date – for its role in these crimes. None of the Financial Moguls or Pirate Barons involved have gone to prison for their crimes.

7) Wactivists

Using the Alkranet to voice strong opinions is nothing new, but this year a known group of net pranksters has been actively using their skills to help others. The ‘John Does’ a group of anonymous online activists, have begun taking progressive steps again anyone who threatens freedom of speech. In the past the John Does only fought those who wanted to control their anything-goes webs forum FiveChan. However, threats by large companies and spiritual groups caused them to mobilize and strike out against the attackers who were trying hurt others simply for their personal affiliations. To date, the John Does have launched collective campaigns against several organizations. They have taken on those who molest children, make laws against sexual orientation, and those who make unusually strict laws against immigration. Their most recent campaign is currently working to get a hate group called ‘Heaven Doesn’t Want You’ removed from public spaces.

6) Bryttasish Royals Everyday Actions Exposed

With some saucy newlywed flings and a new baby on the way, interest in the Primary Son of the High Baron of Bryttas and his new wife has grown out of control. Gossip moguls have hacked the phones, published nude pictures, and performed pranks on the young couple, and the brutal Bryttasish media has been obsessed with every detail of the pair’s lives. From describing in detail what they do to exercise in the morning to where the new bride does her shopping, nothing is off limits to the media.

5) The Dark Secrets of Cage University

A horrific scandal has rocked one of Kroy’s largest centers of learning. Cage University is academically a good school, but has always relied on its reputation for creating leatherball stars. And there was no greater leatherball coach than Poe Patrone, known to many by the affectionate nickname PoPa. Patrone relied on his trusty assistant Vince Toledo to keep the little details in line, so that he could focus on winning games. Unfortunately the trust of Patrone and the University was horribly misplaced. Toledo used his extraordinary access in the university to molest children. Toledo even created a charity for orphaned children that allowed him greater access to vulnerable kids.

When the truth finally came out, Toledo was arrested on nearly fifty charges of child molestation. Some of those charges came from Toledo’s own adopted son. Patrone retired in shame, and passed away soon after. After Patrone’s death and a serious investigation, officials realized that the abuse was even worse than suspected. The school officials and Patrone knew the children were being abused, but he kept quiet due to Toledo’s assistance on the field.

4) Unusually Warm Weather Attributed to Galactic Radiation

For the third straight year, temperatures across the galaxy’s planets have been much higher than normal. Scientists state this is a major sign that galactic radiation is taking a serious toll on all systems in the galaxy. Several plans are in motion to limit or eliminate emissions of galactic radiation in the next few years, but the action may be too little too late. Experts say that even if radiation was halted today, it would take decades for the effects to fade from the galaxy.

3) Crisis in Keyturas.

Evidence has come to light that the Kroy and its Allies have been teaming up with their sworn enemies the terrorist organization known as ilQeata to topple Mogul Piyyat. The Keyturan rebels hope to overthrow the current Mogul and install their own leader. The rebels have been fighting with the help from Kroy and Bryttas forces, but an unlikely ally has joined their ranks. There are now reports that Saleban (also known as the Saliban) and IlQeata operatives are now helping the rebellion in the highest levels of leadership.

2) Moguls Fail SOAPA

There have been two serious attempts on the freedom of the Alkranet this year. The first was a Blanco House bill named SOAPA–Stop Online Alkranet Piracy Act — which was put before a vote. The bill stated that in order to combat net-based crime, the web would have to be put to strict new laws and rules. When major web based Moguls and regular surfers found out about these rules, they were livid. Not only did the makers of the bill not understand how the web’s system worked, but their attempts to regulate it would cripple access. After the largest online protest in history, the bill was firmly destroyed.

And Kroy law makers seem to have learned their lesson. When the galactic council tried to create a resolution restricting freedom to their own guidelines, the Kroy members walked out. They stated that they believed uncensored internet access was a basic right. Without Kroy, and the support of its allies, no legislation to restrict the medium will ever be truly successful.

1) IMF Finds that Galactic Radiation has Started to Take its Toll

Adding to the overwhelming evidence of galactic radiation, the Intergalactic Monetary Fund has released a report instructing the Moguls and the Baronage alike on how to successfully start a campaign to fight galactic radiation. The IMF helps policy makers throughout the galaxy create balanced plans to assist them in financial stability. The IMF specializes in creating balanced plans for undisputed growth or change within the galaxy. If an organization as established and scientifically based as the IMF is making plans to deal with radiation, it is a clear key that the rest of the galaxy should stand up and take notice.

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